Dangerous! Tea Time Turns to Mayhem?
by branewurms
Summary: Xellos/Filia. Originally written for the Slayers kink meme on LJ. Prompt: "Their very opposite energies create some rather interesting results when combined." Rated M for sexual content.


Originally written for the Slayers kink meme on LJ. Warning: Sexual situations, though not very explicit.

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Dangerous! Tea Time Turns to Mayhem?

Several innocent passers-by on the street froze, eying the little antique shop with trepidation. The townsfolk had learned to ignore the periodic screams, but actual explosions could well signal impending doom. They glanced around at one another warily, and by collective unspoken agreement - _we want nothing to do with this_ - they moved on, quickly.

"How could I have possibly known that this would happen, Filia-san?" the mazoku-priest demanded, quite reasonably.

"Don't try to deny it, you dirty mazoku!" Filia quivered with rage, her tail (she would, Xellos suspected, never learn to control that thing) sweeping back and forth violently, sending shards of broken pottery flying through the air. "Nearly half of my merchandise is ruined! My beautiful vases! My _tea cups!_" she wailed, bringing a hand to her forehead. For a moment she swayed, looking as though she might faint - but she recovered quickly, turning her fury back on Xellos. "I know you planned this! Filthy garbage!"

Xellos's eyebrow began twitching uncontrollably. "Now, see here! You were the one who started it -"

A shriek of indignation cut him off. "How dare you! To imply such a thing - a pure and innocent maiden such as myself - you clearly tricked me!" She covered her mouth, shaking her head as if with profound regret, gazing off to the heavens with tears in her eyes. "To take advantage of a maiden's innocence thus - how terrible! How cruel!"

"I'd hardly call _that_ 'innocence'," Xellos muttered.

The roar of fury that followed shook the very foundations of the earth, and the vase that flew through the air nearly took Jiras's head with it as it shattered against the wall where he crouched in the corner, desperately trying to blend in with shelves.

Gravos and he had been minding the shop so that Filia could have her tea-break when the shrieks that always signaled Xellos's unexpected arrivals had started. When said shrieks had turned to deep, drawn out moans, they'd looked at each other uncertainly, and then crept upstairs, peeking around the doorframe of the dining room. There they found the impossible sight of their beautiful employeer straddling the mazoku's hips, her skirt hiked up to her waist, her head thrown back in what was most assuredly pleasure. The beastmen had stayed rooted to the floor, frozen in shock as they watched the mazoku rip Filia's dress up the center and toss it to the floor - and the dragon did not seem to even notice, her nails scratching over his chest and back, her teeth biting into his shoulders and throat as she rode him hard and fast. Xellos hadn't seem to mind the rough treatment; in fact, his expression could only be described as _smug._

But then - _but then._ When Filia arched up with a cry, the mazoku following behind her with a growl of his own, the devestating wave of energy flowed out from them blasted Gravos and Jiras into a heap against the far wall and rumbled through the floorboards like an earthquake. A horrible splintering noise had been the only warning before they all crashed down into the shop below, shattering whole shelves full of Filia's precious ceramics.

Now bruised and terrified, Jiras looked to Gravos and signaled, and they began to quietly gather up a few of the more expensive pieces that still remained unbroken while the war raged on.

"Disgusting pervert! Vandal! Raw garbage!"

"Oh-hooooo," Xellos cackled, his eyebrow twitching into overtime. "But isn't this just the result of _your_ lack of self-control, Filia-san? If you ask me, this is only further proof that you dragons can't keep control over your violent impulses."

"W-wha-_WHAT_ did you say?!" Filia aimed her mace at the mazoku's face; Jiras and Gravos cringed in alarm. "Don't think I'll let you get away with that, you filthy mazoku!"

The two beastmen took that as their cue to make their escape, cradling delicate ceramics in their arms as they crept out through a large hole in the wall. Protecting some of his boss's merchandise from her own fury was the least he could do, Jiras reasoned; and besides, he _really_ didn't want to be there when Filia finally realized she was standing there in full view of the street, stark naked but for her lacy pink garter-belt.


End file.
